…and you create another lifestyle. Your plan B becomes the only plan.
We dream about the life we want in our adolescent years and coming into adulthood: College, career, family yada yada yada. But when we don’t get the career we want, the husband or wife we dreamed about, then what? We do something else.
Although cliche, there are no guarantees in life. Sh*t happens and we play the hand we are dealt.
I’m saying all of this to say that we can’t get stuck on the “what if’s” and “why’s” of life. I wanted to be happily married to a fine, loving man by now and with 3 kids…two boys and a girl, living a life of luxury. It didn’t happen. I’m 39, single and incapable of bearing children of my own. I don’t know why this is my life, but it is. I am okay with where I am. I have come to terms with not being able to have kids. Yes I went through a mini depression after I had the hysterectomy in 2011 (due to multiple and over-size uterine fibroids). Yes I felt damaged. Yes I felt like less of a woman. However, I later made a choice! I chose to be the best single- no- kids person that I can be.
I’m not saying that I’ve “arrived” and that I have it all figured out. Am I totally, completely, emotionally okay? I would say, not exactly. I have my moments. But I knew I didn’t want this thing to take control of my life. I did not want to slip deeper and deeper into a dark hole of depression where I couldn’t climb out of it, on my own. I saw myself going there and it scared me.
I looked within, and talked to God. But most importantly I made a choice to NOT be a victim of my circumstances, but be a champion of enjoying the journey. I got another life.
Peace & Blessings,